Tired of simply scarfing down your burger patties and dumping your tray in the garbage can? Add some fun to your meal! Introducing the Trash Burger. Try this the next time you're out at a fast food burger joint...
WORST-CASE SCENARIO - The cashier picks up the Trash Burger, realizes he's been duped, and laughs hysterically. He gives you a high-five and says, "That's some funny ass shit!" He'll tell his boss and co-workers and they'll tell the story every time you come in there after that. Hell, they might even give you a coupon for a free ice cream cone!
BEST-CASE SCENARIO - The burger joint will be so busy, they don't have time to look closely at your Trash Burger. The manager will apologize profusely, grab another pre-made sandwich, and give it to you for free. You can't lose!
- Eat your food. This step is very important. If you do not eat your food, you will not have any trash, and thus, no Trash Burger.
- Lay one of your empty burger wrappers flat on your tray and pile your trash in the center of it. Your trash will typically consist of things like empty ketchup packets, those disgusting pickle slices you're too smart to eat, and the beard net of the stoner chef who made your sandwich. Note: Solid-colored burger wrappers work well, and those foil Dairy Queen wrappers are the best because you can't see through them.
- Fold the corners of your burger wrapper around the trash pile and mold it until it looks like a burger. Try your best to make it look like it did when you first unwrapped it. Concentrate on duplicating the height and diameter of an actual burger. Bonus points if you've worked in fast food before because this step will be a breeze!
- Place the Trash Burger in the center of your tray, walk casually to the counter where you purchased your food and set the tray down.
- Say to the cashier with a straight face, "This burger tastes like garbage."
WORST-CASE SCENARIO - The cashier picks up the Trash Burger, realizes he's been duped, and laughs hysterically. He gives you a high-five and says, "That's some funny ass shit!" He'll tell his boss and co-workers and they'll tell the story every time you come in there after that. Hell, they might even give you a coupon for a free ice cream cone!
BEST-CASE SCENARIO - The burger joint will be so busy, they don't have time to look closely at your Trash Burger. The manager will apologize profusely, grab another pre-made sandwich, and give it to you for free. You can't lose!
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