Abhorrer Of Torpor

By:  Brandon Schlong

Written: Wee hours of the morn Nov. 28, 2006
Fucked and Formatted: April/2013

rEUBENICKENOBICKLe

What the Goddamn-hell d’ya mean?

Of course, I did!  Like, fuckin’ three, four hours!

Jeez-uss Harold Christ on the Shitter!

W-w-w-w-w-what the shit is this, anyways?

Of course!  I’m Goddamn great!

I already told you…like three hours!

Yeah?

Well, I ain’t Goddamn lyin’ about this!

What the fuck is with all the looks yer givin’ me?

Hey, there!  Mr.  Tollackson!  Hey, Larry!

Yeah, my wife here thi…

Yes, good morning Stephanie.

Larr...!  Oh, absolutely gorgeous.

Yes…yes…yes, indeedee-o.

You and Larry off to the vineyards this weekend?

Beautiful...
Excuse me, please…Steph…Larry…

You better Goddamn not start walkin’ away again!

Y…?  Yeah!

Seems it must be opening night of:

"Inquisition By The Davenport.”

The latest comedy by Arthur Dickerson,

Cause you’re fuckin’ laughin’!

Hanh?  No?  Not opening night?

This ring slides off real Goddamn easy!  Y’know?

What the fuck ever!  Hey! Hey!

Well, what the shit d’ya know everybody?

It just so happens, that my identical twin’s name

Is Goddamn Gregory Winchester, too!

And yer talkin’ to the God of Hell!

Oh yeah, I’m kinda new ‘round here.

The name is apparently St. Lucifer!

Seems, I’m the Goddamn Father of Lies!

Where’s the Goddamn welcome-wagon?

Prize patrol…nothin’…?

Ya, know…swee…I…dammit!

Swee…hey…lis…now Goddamn…No!

Well I...C...Na-na-na, I am definitely not pullin’ my pants back up!

I fuckin’ am proud of myself, woman!

Yeah...it is Goddamn cute!

Fuck you, then!  

Awesome timing kids!

School just got out for the day, eh?

Hey!  Boys and girls…!

Hey, everyone! 

I’m the embodiment of all things Evil!

Satan Incarnate!

Why’n’cha call me Gregory Winchester fer the Goddamn, fuckin’ Hell of it!

Hey, honey where’re the Goddamn Palsy Twins at?

Turns out ol’ Satan married a Goddamn mental patient!

Pfft-uh-ha-ha-yeah…oookaayy.

I’ve really had just about enough of your God-Fucking sarcasm!

Faaa-cckk-inn-man-alive!

Well…pfft…whatever…!

Fuckin’ whatever!

Because, I am gonna find the Goddamn Palsy Twins and they are

Gonna see me do the Goddamn wiener-tucker!

Yeah…well…pfft...shit...