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Top 5 ... 'American Gladiators' Games

TOP 5 - 'AMERICAN GLADIATORS' GAMES - We're talking about the classic, original American Gladiators here, which aired from 1989 to 1996.  I loved that show and always thought the athletic events they competed in were awesome and probably a lot of fun to do.  Who doesn't want to give Swing Shot a try, right?  So I've compiled my Top 5 list of American Gladiators games.  I consulted a master list on Wikipedia, and clicking on the event names below will show you a video of each one, courtesy of American Gladiators.com and YouTube.  The only criteria is, How awesome was the game?  Enjoy! 



1.  Assault - Ever notice how the cross-bow had the touchiest trigger in the world?  I swear, most times that flimsy foam arrow would be in flight before the contestant even got a chance to aim it.  And when the arrow did fly, it never went straight.  My favorite weapon was the ball cannon; It seemed to be the only one with even a trace of accuracy.  All this and the contestants had to break-dance their way across the arena floor while dodging tennis balls being shot out of a cannon at 150-mph, plus there was a finish line and a time limit.  There was just so much going on in this game, it has to be #1!  

2.  Powerball - What can I say, I loved watching Gladiators execute picture-perfect form tackles on part-time fitness trainers.  Ever notice how a lot of contestants tried to use that hip-shake spin-move combo...and how rarely it worked?  It's one of those things where, even though I know the Gladiator would likely not be faked out, I'd do the exact same thing if I was out there.  I'm pretty sure everyone would try the spin-move at least once, it's just instinct.  The game kind of combines football and basketball a little bit, it's great.

3.  Joust - There are few things more entertaining than watching people hit each other in the head with pugil sticks.  I always enjoyed when, instead of using the long padded side of the over-sized Q-Tip, a contender would jab their opponent with the butt-end of the stick like a fencer.  A gut shot with the butt-end of the stick was hilarious, but a shot to the ol' face mask was pure gold.  You gotta love the Joust!   

4.  Atlasphere - This game definitely favored the bigger, stronger contestants, but it was always more fun to watch when a 95-pound woman tried to maneuver this heavy metal orb.  Every once in a while, they'd lose their balance and wind up plastered to the inside wall of the Atlasphere and just spin all the way around in there like a cat stuck in the dryer.  That always made me smile.  Ah, the simple joys in life.  

5.  Hang Tough - In the land of a thousand rings suspended from the ceiling, contestants tried to advance to the finish while being stalked by a juiced-up Gladiator.  It was like watching prey being hunted in the wild.  And when the Gladiator did catch the contestant, they'd hang on their back and try to separate the contestant's shoulder from it's socket while simultaneously trying to shatter their elbows and break their fingers.  The contestants would try to hold on until the time expired, but they usually succumbed to the beating.  Now that's just good television!  

Also Receiving Votes... 

The Wall - The Wall is great.  I think all office buildings should have this as a level-climbing option.  Take the stairs, take the elevator... or take The Wall.  You'd just strap on a bungee cord, grab some footholds, and off you go.  Then you'd be waiting for a colleague up on the 10th-floor, "Has anyone seen Dave?"  Reply, "Yeah, I just saw him on The Wall a few minutes ago, he should be on his way."  (Looking out the window.)  "Oh wait, a Gladiator got him, he's going to be late." 

Pyramid - In this one, contestants tried to scale a foam rubber mountain while the Gladiators on higher ground tried to prevent them from reaching the top.  Foam rubber is the best.  You could fall all the way to the bottom and not get hurt.  If I had a backyard filled with nothing but trampolines and foam rubber pads... I'd be the happiest man-child in the world.

Human Cannonball - The Gladiator stands on a 3-foot wide platform with a shield the size of a postage stamp while the contestant swings towards them on the world's longest rope like Tarzan through the jungle and tries to knock them off.  Not exactly a fair fight, but damn, it was entertaining!

Swing Shot - This was a quality game, making excellent use of the bungee cords.  I definitely want to play this game at some point in my life.  Some how, some way.  It seems like a lot of fun... except for the fact that the Gladiator's only objective is to pummel you in mid-air.  So, other than a possible physical beat-down, it seems like a lot of fun.  

Sky Track - This event -- in which contestants wore Velcro on their hands and feet and raced along an upside-down track -- was so far ahead-of-it's-time that it went all the way around and is now back behind-it's-time.

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