THE RATASS GAZETTE

Poison - Fallen Angel - 1988 RANDOM THOUGHTS ... I love this song. I've been a fan of Poison for 25 years now. I used to watch MTV all the time when this song came out in 1988, and I mean all the time . Yet I had never seen this video until today. How the hell is that even possible? It seems impossible, right? ... I like the little 30-second intro video with the family at the dinner table. Kind of explains the meaning of the song, and tells us what we're about to see. I don't think Poison did a lot of those. Then again, "Talk Dirty to Me" is pretty straight forward. ... I almost didn't recognize Bret Michaels in this vid without his trademark bandana and trademark three girls on each arm. Instead, at times, he's got a red hat that barely fits over hair that's bigger than C.C.'s (not really). It's not a bad look. I wonder when he started going exclusively bandana in public? I'll have to do some research. ... I've said for years tha...

Rank These Curtis Armstrong Movies: __ Risky Business __ Revenge of the Nerds __ Better Off Dead __ One Crazy Summer __ Revenge of the Nerds II Known Brandon Schlong Aliases:   - Harold Schlafli - Harold Richard Baker - Bob Donovan - Luigi Ponderosa - Rudy Bagelman - Maurice Lester - Tarkin Kott - Bird Billson - Ricky French What Is Your Favorite Brandon Schlong Dance Move?   1) The Super-Slow Running Man 2) The Checkerboard (AKA The Jiggler) 3) The Uncle Jim 4) The Burger Dance Do You Agree That Trick Questions Are For Shit?   A) Emerald B) Sapphire  C) Ruby  D) Garnet  Do This Right Now:   Count to ten as fast as you can,  using your best  James Hetfield voice  on the number ten.  Failed RATASS Gazette Business Ventures:   + Morning Dump Energy-Lax + 45 Degree Angle Shelves + 1-Sided Dice  Answer Key: * In order to get a Mantra you must speak Sanskrit.