THE RATASS GAZETTE

WARNING:  DO NOT READ THIS POST IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THE MOST RECENT EPISODE OF HELL'S KITCHEN.  SECRETS REVEALED AND SURPRISES RUINED!  On the most recent episode of Hell's Kitchen ... Chef Ramsey hates everything the chefs prepare and tells one of them to " Piss off! ".  The loud-mouth chef will cause friction with one of the non-loud-mouth chefs, prompting each of them to refer to the other from now on as their "nemesis".  Chef Ramsey will get in a chef's face, scream " You call this a fucking risotto?!?! ", and spend the next three on-screen minutes rubbing his temples in obvious agony.  Customers will complain about their food not being up to par, even though they've listened to the head chef berate his colleagues with F-bombs at the top of his lungs for the last 45 minutes.  You're not going to believe this, but... ( cue the dramatic tympani music and big-voice radio announcer ), someone got sent home this week!

"Having said that..." - A hilarious scene from Curb Your Enthusiasm featuring Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David, and Jason Alexander.  This is from Season 7 (2009).  An instant classic!

RANDOM THOUGHTS ... Awesome clip of Better Than Ezra playing their song "Good" on The Late Show with David Letterman in 1996.  I'm always impressed by bands that can go on these late night shows for just one song and absolutely nail it.  The lead singer, Kevin Griffin, has rock star looks and a rock star voice, and wearing a leather jacket while singing and playing guitar is very rock star.  The bass line is nice and clean and the drummer really adds punch with his powerful style. Great performance of a great song!

"Here's to feeling good all the time." -  Physical comedy at it's finest!  Michael Richards is a comic genius, I don't know if any other actor could have made this scene as hilarious as he did.  It's amazing how many laughs they squeeze into a minute and a half.  One of my favorite Seinfeld episodes of all time!  ("The Sniffing Accountant", Season 5, Episode 4). Kramer: "I'll have a brewskie, Charlie."  Bartender: "The name's Mitch."  Haha, enjoy! 

As the resident Vikings fan on the RATASS Staff, I feel I should weigh in with my take on their off-season maneuvers, so here goes... MOUNT MCKINNIE RELEASED -  I was pretty surprised when I heard the Vikings released Bryant McKinnie, and I was also pretty disappointed.  I know he showed up to training camp out of shape, but I was hoping they would give him some time before they let him go.  Big men like McKinnie do not grow on trees, and he will certainly be hard to replace.  New LT Charlie Johnson seems like a nice enough guy, and the fact that people call him Charlie makes me like him even more, but I seriously doubt he's the blocker Mount McKinnie was.  I'll miss the big guy, and I'm still holding out hope they re-sign him in the future.    Here's how the Vikings O-Line looks at the moment ( according to Vikings.com ): LT - Charlie Johnson LG - Steve Hutchinson C - John Sullivan RG - Chris DeGeare RT - Phil Loadholt Outlook:   U...

James "Flight" White is kind of an internet sensation, having competed in some legendary slam dunk competitions in his day.  If you're not familiar with White, he played college ball at the University of Florida (for one season) and the University of Cincinnati (for three seasons from 2003-2006), averaged 16.3 points per game his senior year, and dunks like a freaking madman! Here you can see him dunk from the free throw line with ease... using two hands!  He's not just scraping these dunks over the rim, he's got plenty of distance.  Check it out! Here is a highlight reel of the infamous 2010 slam dunk contest that took place in Russia.  Dime Magazine called it the best dunk contest nobody saw .  At this Russian Cup competition, the finals came down to "Flight" White and (former NBA Slam Dunk Champion) Gerald Green. As you might imagine with both guys being high-flying and creative dunkers, there are some very tasty dunks in here.  I personal...

I love stand-up comedy, and I think Brian Regan is one of the best out there! A few clips here from his "Brian Regan Live" album. I encourage everybody I meet who has Netflix capabilities to check out his his half-hour "Comedy Central Presents" special! This guy has absolute gold material! The first is about making an ass out of yourself from a long ways away... Next, a completely true and sadly relatable feeling about playing softball as an adult. "There's not a whole lot more humbling in life..." Finally, my favorite bit about monster truck drivers and going to a mechanic when you don't know anything about cars. "What the hell are you talking about?" Haha!

We love The Office here at the RATASS Gazette, and here is a look at some hilarious moments involving Andy "The Nard Dog" Bernard.  Enjoy! "How's the apartment hanging?" - Here is a fantastic clip where Andy and Jim are en route to a sales call.  It cracks me up how Andy tries to be so cool, riffing on global warming (" Today was supposed to be really cold, I bet. ") and whatnot.  Beer me! "You. Me. Bar. Beers. Buzzed." - This is one of my personal favorite bits from The Office .  Michael is sick of Andy sucking up to him and shoots him down pretty hard.  Gold!  "Country roads, take me home!" - In this classic scene, Andy and Dwight are both trying to impress new receptionist Erin.  Of course, the Nard Dog scores big points by singing perfect harmony.  Great stuff!